I wanted it to be true. I wanted to be in total control of my creativity. I wanted to be solely responsible for my work. I didn’t want to need anyone else…
Then I thought, ‘What a bunch of horse shit’.
Could I be any more arrogant?
Think about it. I wanted to know if I could create everything I wanted to create without looking for inspiration anywhere else other than inside of me.
When the truth is that I’m inspired by external sources everyday. Not just by people, but by nature, animals – my dogs have wonderful personalities that never cease to amaze me – books, music, the internet. The list goes on pretty much forever.
So to not want to be inspired by other people is just wrong. Sure I don’t have any one person that works as my muse, but how limiting would that be?
No, I want my creativity to be limitless. I want the people who annoy the shit out of me to play an integral part in my next novel. And not necessarily so that I can kill them off. We need those people. Those people are the mirrors of life showing us where we need to grow.
I’ll let that sink in for a minute…
Inspiration is everywhere – internal, external, in unexpected people and places. So for me to only want to find it internally is a sure way to fail and be miserable.
I don’t care if I live to be 150, I still want to look at the world like a kid, with wonder and awe and humility that I am allowed to contribute to the beauty and meaning of our lives.
So let me say thank you to all of those people who’ve provided inspiration to me. I hope I can return the favor someday, if I haven’t already.